when i can begin with,

“it’s not my fault,”

i can find much more spaciousness

for what the other person is feeling…

~reflections on navigating conflict in relationship~

on holding space for the ways in which i disappoint others.

if i can make their emotional experience

something i don’t need to feel responsibility for,

i am able to show up more freely.

without malice, shame, regret.

but a full appreciation for each other’s humanity.

and the ways in which hurting each other

is an indication

that we are alive.

— thoughts prompted by a point made by ashe phoenix on the Dear Jessamyn podcast

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